You Get What You Pay For

"Half my life's in books' written pages, live and learn from fools and from sages. You know it's true. All the things come back to you" Aerosmith from "Dream On"

the nurse had the nerve to ask me if I watched "America's Top Model". Is she serious? Do I strike you as the type of guy who would waste my precious ticks of the clock watching a bunch of broads who consider a Tic Tac a meal as they plod, bones clanking, along a runway in what some designer asshole calls fashion? I think not. When it comes to a night of the tube I've got some pretty lofty standards. I want my Dixie cup filled, I want my binding straps loosened, and I want my television to provoke more thoughts than "Jeebus, I want to slay all those skinny nit wits."

There was once a little show called "Dream On". HBO produced a half hour comedy series that featured real people, speaking real profanity, and having sex with women with real fake boobs. It may not have been the greatest show since the Honeymooners, but it proved that pay channels could produce original programming at a level that the major networks couldn't touch.

The progression has got out of hand. While network television consistently offers up more reality shows and CSI spin offs, it's on the pay channels that the real entertainment is coming from. And have been coming from for some time.

My love for the Sopranos, even after the unfulfilling finale, is the paradigm of what all programs are measured against. Never before had I found a show more entertaining, more solidly written than the tale of the New Jersey mob boss and his crew. It was something that captured my attention through incredibly long season breaks, I mean year and a half, that's a while to wait for a new episode of anything, but for Tony and the fellas I waited, and celebrated their return. And with that program it seemed HBO went on a rampage.

The next great show that I watched like a crack addict was Deadwood. Here was another great example of the HBO formula. Cast a bunch of relatively unknown actors who have some major talent, give them scripts that featured some of the most sharp dialogue that was written, and toss in a bit of violence and some sex. Listening to Al Swearingen break down his troubles while getting felated shocked and mesmerized me. This show was too good to last and found it's end after a very short run.

Then I got transported to Rome for the story of soldiers, Marc Antony, and of course Cleopatra. This show was another step in the right direction. High production levels, beautiful sets, amazing performances, and my Atia. Polly Walker, Goddess. It had just the right blend of villainy and heroism.

Entourage tapped into a different side of my brain. The Hollywood lust that I have. No, I've never wanted to be an actor. But a writer and director have always been on my wish list. This show caught me from the first episode and though it sometimes get knocked for the sitcom formula where everything seems to work out for the guys in a half hour, I kept coming back. All lot of that had to do with Jeremy Piven in the greatest role of his career since PCU. Ari the Agent.

Now lately, I'm becoming a fan of some Showtime fare. Weeds is the most intriguing show I have seen and I eat it like candy. Californication is wickedly well written. The humor and pace of the speech on that show will make me a fan until it's dying day.

I can't wait to see what the next great show is gonna be.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention FX. Though not a pay channel, shows like The Shield, Rescue Me, The Riches, and Nip/Tuck are all amazing. So, they are moving in the right direction. Well done cable channel. Well done.

Do you watch any pay channel series? FX? What would you like to see?

Dixie Cup of Love: The best $14 I spend a month.